Dear Love Guru,
I live with my in laws and they always want me to dress in salwar kameezes. I’m a modern woman. I want to dress in western clothes but they just don’t like it. What do I do?
Clothes do not make a person. A good nature does. If your in laws love you and support you in everything you do, wouldn’t it just be easier to keep the peace in the family by wearing what they want you to? Alternatively, when you go out with your husband, you can wear what you like. If it’s for family functions go shopping with your mother in law and come to a common conclusion on the outfits you need to wear. If none of this works, wear the salwar kameez when you leave the house but change for those few hours when you’re out with friends. Just remember, if you are caught you’ll have a lot of answering to do. Also, communicate with your husband on what you want to wear and why they are not letting you do so. Is it because they do not want people talking ill about your reputation and character? Or they are scared that you might attract unwanted attention? Let them know that you are strong and independent and can handle yourself in such situations. Moreover, if you live in a very conservative family, I’d just like to say you knew what you were getting into. Why not try to adapt to their wishes sometimes. After all, marriage is about compromise.